So we’re talking places we’ve been to or lived in this week. The weirdest for me was Vegas. I lived there for a year. One of my kids was born there. I hated every minute of it, from the time I stepped off the plane to the time I drove out of the valley flipping the bird at everything behind me. Did I mention I hated living in Vegas???
Just imagine this. You’re a good Southern girl. Army vet. Wife. Mother. Still, you’ve never been out of the South (cept for parts of Florida, which I promise you are not Southern lol). So you have a 9 month old, you’re 5 months pregnant, your husband is going to Korea for a year, and you parents have lost their damned minds and moved to Vegas. What do you do? You follow them of course. Cause if we do one thing right in the South, it’s following family around the country. 
So the first thing I see when I get off the plane, after hours and hours and hours of traveling with a 9 month old, and did I mention I was pregnant? And they didn’t feed me? Anyway, first thing I see is slot machines. Row after row of slot machines. Now I wasn’t opposed to gambling, but being from the South I’d never seen it before. I was tired. I was hungry. I had a very grumpy baby. Then I walked outside. In November. It was 80. I froze my butt off. It’s amazing the difference humidity makes.
Vegas and I were not off to a good start. Unfortunately, it didn’t improve.
My mom picked me up that day and we went immediately to dinner. The whole drive Emma Rose screamed in the backseat (she’d been cooped up for hours, who could blame her?) and mom kept asking why she couldn’t just ride in my lap. Hello? Safety issues? It’s a wonder anyone of my generation survived babyhood. We got to the restaurant finally and had to order 3 times. Cause this guy had obviously never heard a Southern accent. Then I got endure a lecture, from a waiter!!, about how bad it was to consume undercooked meat while pregnant. Guy was lucky I didn’t stab him with my knife. Dude, when a pregnant woman orders a steak, just bring it!
I survived the first day. I have no idea how.
The rest of the days weren’t a big improvement. When people weren’t speaking slowly and succinctly to me, cause ya know, I’m Southern and dumb, they were making me repeat myself over and over. The accent is so strange after all.
So a few things I learned in Vegas…
The only restaurant with sweet tea was Shoneys. Sorry folks. It’s closed now.
The food…well, they don’t cook with butter or salt. Eat it at your own risk.
It doesn’t matter how hot you imagine it is. If it’s 120 outside with less than 10% humidity, the pool is cold.
The desert is only beautiful for about 3.5 seconds. Then it’s dirt after dirt after dirt…
When you sit down in a restaurant and they ask you if you want real tacos or American tacos, you’ve come to the right place. Man, that’s the only thing I miss about Vegas!
Casinos, shmaminos. I saw two come down while I was there. I ate dinner several times a week at one of the local places. My faves on the strip were the Luxor (the sheer size of it!) and the Mirage (ahhh, humidity!!). But the entire time I was there I never once gambled. Not one quarter. Army Guy came home on leave in April when Katie was born and put a quarter in a slot machine at the airport on his way back to Korea. One quarter. Won a hundred bucks. I never have that kind of luck lol.
It wasn’t all bad though, and is this is part of what was good.
On leave…daddy’s and their girls lol!
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mommy and her girls. Yes. I was blonde. And had short hair.
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Emma Rose with one of Grandpa’s roses.
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I have to say, I was never so happy as the day I left Las Vegas. I’m not sure if it was because Army Guy was out of the country that year or if I really was a fish out of water. I’m sure it’s a great place for some. But not for me. LOL. 
Despite how much I hated living there, I don’t regret the road Vegas took me on. It’s amazing what the difference of 11 years can make!
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June 19th, 2008 at 9:41 am
I can sympathize. I lived in Minnesota for a year. I loved the beauty of it, the culture (awesome museums!) and the snow. Yes, I can totally handle snow. BUT…
It wasn’t a good fit.
I’m from the south. Been in Texas 98% of my life. The two years it took to get here when I was an infant really can’t count. I HAD to move with the rest of the tribe. LOL So take a southern Texan and move her 1500 miles due north. Yeah. They didn’t get me. From free wheeling, free thinking, enjoy life to …. Well… you can figure it out. I lasted nine months.
Minnesota nice has NOTHING on Texas Friendly y’all.
June 19th, 2008 at 9:48 am
I love Vegas and I hate humidity. Think there’s a correlation there?
June 19th, 2008 at 2:25 pm
I have never ever been to Vegas. I want to though…for the experience. But, I don’t want to live there.
June 20th, 2008 at 12:43 pm
I hate humidity and I live in a sweatbox imitating a state. But I do feel for you.