I ran across this lovely site that has a dirty limerick for each state of the union. Oh, you know I couldn’t resist. I give you, a naughty limerick for the home state of each Novelty Girls. (Ladies, don’t beat me if I got your state wrong. It’s eeeearly.) And I even found this site to get a hockey limerick for our token Canadian, Dayna.
California for mine and Jen’s home state:
To her new beau from bright California,
The blonde said, “I guess I should warn ya –
I’m unfaithful, on drugs,
I enjoy taunting thugs,
And when I find a rich guy I’ll scorn ya.”
Alabama for Lori:
For a hot time in warm Alabama,
On a Saturday night Nate would cram a
Small mike up his bum
And then sing, fart and hum
Delta blues to amuse his ol’ gramma.
Massachusetts for Nonny:
There’s a place in Cape Cod, Massachusetts
Where the women have not one but two sets
Of boobs, but no cracks
To accomp’ny those racks,
So the men have perpetual blue sets.
Utah for me:
A Sunday school pupil in Utah
Liked to play with himself in his pew. Ta-
bernacular rite
was profaned when he’d cite:
“. . . Leviticus, Numbers, then Deut–AAAHHHHHH!”
Arkansas for Lyric:
A tourist in Little Rock, Arkansas
Went strolling in Riverfront Park and saw
A thin girl with one tooth
Getting rimmed by a youth,
Who informed him, “We call it ‘Ozarkin’! Chaw?”
Texas for RG:
The self-styled seducer from Texas
Thought he’d score more hot babes with a Lexus.
All he got was a slap,
Plus a fierce dose of clap
And two painful swift kicks to the plexus.
Hockey night in Canada for Dayna:
Though Canucks should be gentle not rough,
There’s one place where we strive to be toughIn that game played on ice
It pays not to be niceAnd second is not good enough.
September 17th, 2007 at 9:42 am
ummm…LOL
September 17th, 2007 at 9:46 am
September 17th, 2007 at 12:34 pm
LMAO!!!! Some of those are just AWFUL.
I especially enjoyed the Nebraska followed later by the Alaska one. Hilarious.
How do you find this stuff.
*sings* “Too much time on my hands. Too much time on my hands.”
September 17th, 2007 at 12:41 pm
It’s amazing what google can find, no?
September 17th, 2007 at 1:57 pm
Amen at hockey.
‘Course it isn’t the ONLY place to be rough, but *shrug* We’re Canadian. We don’t talk about it
September 17th, 2007 at 2:01 pm
Oh…so very b-a-d! LOL!
September 17th, 2007 at 4:15 pm
Lmao! Leave it to Crys to find this stuff.
September 17th, 2007 at 4:18 pm
*preens* It’s a gift.
September 17th, 2007 at 4:19 pm
How EXACTLY does one Google this stuff and aren’t you worried that some geek in Washington D.C. might be jotting down the stuff you DO Google?
“Ms Jordan is googling dirty limericks again, Mr. President. Shall we bust her door in?”
“Only if they’re bad.”
September 17th, 2007 at 4:21 pm
Frankly, if he looks like one of Suzanne Brockmann’s agents he can bust down my door and do wicked things to me. *holds hands out for cuffing*
September 19th, 2007 at 1:19 pm
Ooookay. Very interesting. How exactly do you come up with this stuff? Where in your brain do you cook up these crazy ideas and decide to “Google” them? LOL