The Novelty Girls

I am in a funk. No getting around it. And I apologize beforehand for any whining that may occur {cue world’s smallest violin}.
A few days ago I submitted my third novel, and sometime this week I should have more edits to do for my first…one step closer to my book being released. And I was really excited about it-but now I’m in a funk. My mind keeps zipping from one idea to another. For a few days I got a million story ideas, and then there’s this series I’m halfway through-I definitely want to finish that.

The very same reason I was so proud the other day is the reason I’m feeling so restless. I have been sitting at my computer for a year, writing, and my book isnt out yet. I’m worried about its reception. What if I’m crazy and I’ve just been kidding myself? What if no one wants to hear my stories? What if I’m a great big flop? And yes-I hear the whine in my own voice and its irritating me as well.

I’m reading Harry Potter. Slowly-because Cookie and I are reading aloud to each other, a few chapters a night. Its an HP tradition, plus neither of us wants the other to know what happens before we do. Of course, reading a series that has so tightly gripped the world’s imagination while you are going through a mini dark night of the author’s soul is a double edged sword. On the one hand inspiring, on the other hand…well, that would be whining and I wont put you through any more of that.
I think I am impatient for the other shoe to drop-whether it be a Cinderella slipper or a big, metal-toed boot aimed for my head-you know? Some sign that my path is true, that I’m not delusional. Sadly, I hear many of these concerns don’t go away, even when you’ve sold a dozen books, have an agent and are signing autographs for fans. I’m just in a strange sort of Purgatory right now. And I do not like it one bit.

But I make you a promise right now. Next Tuesday I’ll have something interesting and positive to say. And I’ll climb out of this funk and realize once again how blessed and lucky I am to be doing something I love. To have the opportunity to share with others the strange imaginings and characters that rattle around in my head. And that I have so much support around me while I’m spreading these new and colorful wings.

Horny Haiku Monday is taking a hiatus for the foreseeable future. Why? Because I’m bored with it. When I get unbored, it might come back. Then again…maybe not. It’s my blog day and I’ll post what I want to (you would post too if it happened to yoooooou).

Anyhoo, today I decided to tickle your funny bone with some really callous and disgusting de-motivational posters. Because motivation is easy and inspiring, while de-motivation is just funny.

So maybe find someone who’s life handed them vodka and have a party?

I hate snails, bugs, and all slimy/crawly things. This dude deserves what’s coming to him.

Yeah!

How I feel about work today.

Have you ever sat at the computer and “willed” an idea to come into your head? I’ve been doing this ever since Cobblestone announced its In The Card’s submission guidelines and released the cards each week. And week after week…nothing. I couldn’t think of one freaking idea….until last night. OK…can you say down to the wire. Yes, I finally came up with an idea, wrote the proposal and the first 1K and sent that sucker off earlier this afternoon. We’ll see what happens.

So, my Saturday Six is dedicated to a few things I do to feed my muse….

1) Read. Anything….Everything. There’s nothing like experiencing someone else’s creativity to spur your own. I finished Harry Potter #7, two mystery’s I’ve been reading for over a month, a few erotica’s that I purchased on line.

2) Watch TV. Movies usually work for me. Watching two people fall in love and get there happily ever after is always inspiring.

3) Listen to Music. I’ve been listening to Justin Timberlake, Musiq Soul Child, and NE YO for the last week in the car and I’ve been really blasting my music and grooving to the beat.

4) Write Something Else. I worked on two of the projects I want to finish by the end of the month and knowing where I want those stories to go has helped me too.

5) Pamper Myself. I went to the beauty shop and got my hair done, as well as got a mani and pedi. Love doing that! Nothing like making yourself feel pretty to conjure up a hot and spicy heroine for a hero to drool over.

6) Take A Nap. Any one who really knows me, knows that one of my favorite activities is taking a nap. It’s so rejuvinating and helps clear the mind. Makes me wish I lived somewhere where it was “required” to take a daily Siesta! LOL

What about you? What do you do to feed your muse and keep the creative juices flowing? Hope you have a great Saturday!

Is that too much to ask for?? Apparently. I’m one of those lucky writers that has my own office. Not that you could tell by the steady stream of kids (the short and tall variety) in and out of here. Makes it damned hard to concentrate, especially writing sex scenes. Ugh. But! There’s light at the end of this summer break from hell tunnel. School goes back August 9! Woohoo! I think I’ll throw a party for one that day.
Despite all the craziness and mayhem at my house, I had a great week. I’m working on a revision and this week added 56 pages to it! I have another much shorter revision to get done that I’m going to try and have sent today or tomorrow. So how is everyone doing with the challenge? Post your updates in the comments!

Okay, today is just an announcement day.

1. Starting with the announcement that Nonny is under the weather and can’t post today. Everyone give her some well wishes.

2. If you haven’t noticed yet, our fab RG has her first cover up from Ellora’s Cave over in the Coming Soon area.

3. I sold my novella IN ICE to Kensington Aphrodisia. It was formerly with Cobblestone Press, but now it’ll be in print.

4. I signed with Lucienne Diver of the Spectrum Literary Agency today. Yay!

5. I read Harry Potter in one marathon sitting yesterday because I had the day off for Pioneer Day in Utah. No idea what that means except I get a day off. I liked the book and how she tied everything up in the end…how about you?

Have you ever been so close to finishing your WIP that you can taste it, only to have one thing after another crop up, dragging out those lovely two words “The End” until you feel as if you want to scream? Thats kind of where I am right now. Yesterday I thought I was close. I thought I would finish the story, look it over, and send it off to my editor before I went to bed.
I guess I wasnt as close as I thought. Honestly its my characters fault. I had a rough outline of where they were going, and they took me somewhere else. This has been happening throughout this entire process. So I ended up writing 8k last night, staying up until 3 in the morning, and realizing I still have about 6k left of story {unless they decide to join the circus or go flying off to mars-who knows with this group of characters}.
And then there are the interruptions. I love people and I love visiting, but right now I am not up for coherent conversation. I keep wondering if Linnea will survive the sacrifice she needs to make for her daughter, if one of my Fianna will die in their battle with the Horde and Sauros, and what the heck did my bad guy do to Sheridan {the heroine in my next story} when he kidnapped her that has her so messed up? So when my sister wants to come in and talk, or my husband wants to know what I want for dinner, I usually end up rambling to them about the story.
Do any of you have any experience with this? Getting so wrapped up in the world your creating that its hard to come out of it again and focus on your life? Cross your fingers that I can finish this today. Then I can take a day or two off before I start on Book Three of the series.

Like half the globe, I got my Harry Potter in the mail on Saturday. Yay! I have tomorrow off and I’m going to marathon read the whole thing. Woot!

On with the pervy!

I’m sure this is a tactic that works so well. And yet, I think most of us have/had a boss we wouldn’t mind trying it on. Provided we had the proper plumping for it…which I don’t.

Yank myself at work.
Thick cream for boss’ coffee.
Give me a raise jerk.

Yeah. Right.

meet my super cock
leaps hoes in a single bound
cums like a cannon

I cracked up at this one. Can you say “wardrobe malfunction?”

A bright, sudden flash,
Sunbeam on a winter day:
Janet Jackson’s breast.

Hi, all! I’m Antonia Pearce. As the newest guest Novelite (kid) on the block, I thought I’d discuss something safe today—leave the more daring stuff for the established ladies of The Novelty Girls.

Forget cheese. I want to talk about The Power of “Man Nipple.” No, I was not the genius who coined that phrase, unfortunately, and it may not really be new. You know what I’m talking about. Book covers graced by gloriously smooth, perfectly formed, naked male torsos. In most cases, the beauteous torso dominates the cover. The heroine is typically not depicted at all or relegated to the background and we may not even get a glimpse of the man’s face. Perhaps just a portion of a strong jaw and cleft chin. *insert goofy grin* I can’t help myself. These covers make me happy. They make me drool. Both as a reader and a writer.

I hadn’t really thought of the enormous appeal of “Man Nipple” until just recently. Then our very own R.G. Alexander received her cover art for Lifting the Veil. *blissful sigh*. Take a look at this stunning cover and very tasty bit of Man Nipple!

Robin L. Rotham’s cover for Alien Overnight is another memorable example, featuring a spectacular display of Man Nipple and a rather large sword (no, really—a real sword). See?

As readers and as writers, which covers do you find most enticing? Which is more likely to encourage you to purchase a book? Blow the cover up into a life-sized poster and tape it on the ceiling over your bed? (Oops! Did I ask that?) A female alone on the cover, a couple, or “Man Nipple?”

Just for the record, for my next book cover I WANT MY MAN NIPPLE!

Well…today’s the day. Actually, last night around 12:30ish for me….I got my copy of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. Yes, like so many others, I left my house in search of the last and final tale of Harry Potter. I was up last might until about 4, reading, and had to make myself get some sleep. Now, I’m taking a break from it - briefly - so I can write this post.

So, my Saturday Six today is…..

The Six Things I Won’t Be Doing Today Because I’m Reading H.P.
1. Cooking (Well, I did cook breakfast…but that’s it. I’m done. My family has been told to NOT interrupt me for food. Fend for yourself.

2. Cleaning (I did sweep and mop the kitchen floor….but again…that’s it.)

3. Napping (I really could use a nap, but I just can’t pull myself away from the pages of it. I got through Chapter 10 last night. I am currently reading Chapter 21.)

4. Writing (Sorry, I’ll make up my 5 pages tomorrow.)

5. Moving (From the spot I’m sitting in. I am bathed, clothed, fed, I’m in a LazyBoy and I have my trusty blanket. If I could insert a catheter to keep me from going to the restroom. I would. So, unless it’s a bathroom break - I ain’t movin’.)

6. Stopping (Until I get to the end. It’s really engrossing. Ugh…I want to be J.K. Rowling when I grow up. The twists and turns. I want Harry to TRIUMPH against He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named.)

OK…back to my reading. Have a great weekend!!!

This week in review
So, Nonny asked about burnout, and Lori’s setting goals. I have to say it’s like they wrote exactly what I’ve been thinking/feeling this past week or two. So, I’m going on holiday. Not that I’m heading anywhere exciting…I’m just retreating into my writer cave, and taking a few big steps away from the internet. And back into my kid’s lives. I’ll be checking in online, I’ll just be doing it once every day or two instead of once an hour
So, now, onto the winners of the TNG home alone party.

I’m giving away Crystal Jordan’s book Revenant (because I got to beta read this one before publication, and I love it!) and Lori’s book Hurricane Season (which she keeps teasing me with excerpts of, but won’t give me a copy *sniffle* Must. Go. Shopping. Darnit )

So: The winner of Lori’s book is: Night Diva Maria
and the winner of Crystal’s book is: Gwen Hayes

Thanks again to everyone who came by during my Home Alone PityParty